By Lauren Elise Martin
Most of us are members of a church… Whether we’re “officially” members, or it’s just the church our family attends, we are very much a part of it, no matter which way you state it. You may have attended this particular church all your life, or your family has just recently begun attending: nevertheless, it’s “your” church.
As for me, I was born and raised in the church my family attends, so I’ve attended it all my life, starting with my very first Sunday of life. 
And, my father, too, grew up in this church. I’ve never attended anywhere else, except when visiting people and attending their church, and a few times visiting a church specifically to hear the preacher speaking that Sunday. The people in my church—though they’ve come and gone, been born and buried, during my years there—are like family to me.
Our church has been through plenty of hard times (what church hasn’t?), but my family has remained through it all. We’ve come to view our church membership like marriage: as a commitment. We’ve realized that it doesn’t pay to leave when the going gets tough…sure, we could easily find a church that doesn’t have problems at the moment, but all churches have their problems, so the new one would soon, too. It’s kinda like marriage and divorce—if you leave when it gets a little rough, or when things aren’t quite the same as they always have been, then remarry, the going is likely to get tough in your next marriage, too; and since you’ve already quit one, it’s easier to quit another.
There will always be problems in churches. You can’t have more than one person in a church without having some cause for difference. Music is a biggie, as are building/remodeling projects, doctrine, etc.—you name it, there’ll be division on it. There will always be some people that tend to find fault more than others, and when they leave one church, they’ll just find another to complain in.
That’s why my family has decided to stick it out, and stay in our church, even though things have gotten pretty rough at times. Yes, maybe the music isn’t always our style. And yes, the heartache and stress that comes at times can be pretty grinding; but aren’t such trials the tests of our commitments??? And although we aren’t likeminded about such things as waiting vs. dating, homeschooling, etc., with the majority of the people in our church, we feel we can be (and have been) an influence for the better in our church.
I realize there are some extreme situations where a family needs to leave the church. Major doctrinal differences being a big one. And, as one good friend of our family told my dad, when it starts affecting your kids, then you need to leave. But be very careful how you leave, for even in the best of circumstances, there are many ripples felt when a family leaves the church.
So whenever possible, STAY COMMITTED, and when the turmoil is over, you can look back and say, “See, we stuck it out, and now we’re all the better for staying committed to our church when the going was tough.”
“If a church wants a better pastor, it can get one by praying for the one it has.” -Rev. Robert E. Harris
“Quit griping about your church; if it were perfect, you couldn’t belong.” -Joseph P. Dooley
“Example has more followers than reason.” -Christian Bovee
“Your Church—Enter expectantly, breathe prayerfully, worship reverently, relax restfully, greet others cordially, leave thoughtfully, come again soon.”
“The World at its Worst Needs the Church at its Best.”
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