My mother always told me that her mother always told her: it is selfish to be self-conscious. I have always struggled with being self-conscious.  Maybe everyone else does, too.  But I’m always slightly jealous of those who appear so self-confident.  Because I myself am feeling self-conscious about not being self-confident!  It’s all about self.

Whenever I actually make the conscious effort to be others-conscious, I feel at ease making them feel at ease.  And I’ve found that the easiest way to start is with a simple smile.  The Bible says, “A joyful heart is good medicine” (Proverbs 17:22).  And after all, “Never frown: you don’t know who’s falling in love with your smile.”

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

It takes trust to live without worry for tomorrow. It takes the touch of a Master Physician to put balm on the wounds of yesterday. It takes courage to let go of all these things to really realize that all that He asks of us is to live today. He isn’t concerned about us understanding what is hidden behind the unknown of tomorrow any more than He wants us to be so broken by yesterday that we fail to learn to live today in a way that will truly make it beautiful and worth remembering. He wants us to trust Him to know the end from the beginning, to accept not only joy but sorrow as from a Father’s hand.

But God wants something more from us than just acceptance of the changes in our plans that He allows. He wants us to accept with joy. He wants us to be able to kneel down and build an altar, so to speak, and to lay our will as an offering on that altar, and to get up and go on, not just in submission, but with joy to be living the life that He has chosen for us.

God wants us to be happy. He wants His joy to well up in our hearts and spill out because there is not room to contain it. He wants us to choose this, even when nothing seems to match up with the kind of happiness we wanted. Sometimes we have to choose to find those beautiful things, choose to look at the bright side, choose to be happy even when there seems to be nothing to beautiful, nothing bright, and nothing happy.

“Every day may not be good, but there’s something good in every day.” ~Author Unknown

Tomorrow will be here sooner than you think, there’s no fear for that, and we cannot change yesterday no matter how many tears we cry. God has given us today. In this day He has woven a multitude of little blessings, little pieces of joy worth collecting. It is up to us to find them, and it isn’t any easier at first than it is to find that thimble in a field, yet as we train our minds and hearts to be receptive to the littlest of blessings, we find that we live in a world that is still a beautiful place, filled with evidences great and small of Someone who loves us.

If we make it our habit to find something beautiful in every day, our hearts learn a new language and our trust in Him to provide grows stronger, but even nature knows that one cannot receive unless they also give. So it is with us.

There are souls in this world which have the gift of finding joy everywhere and of leaving it behind them when they go. ~Frederick Faber

And that, by God’s grace, is what I want to be. Today.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

But then the morning came when I flipped on the outdoor light in preparation for Scott’s early morning departure for work to find that rain had faded into white, and even yet, out of the darkness snowflakes were falling and making my world a wonderful, fluffy white. (At least for a little while!) It was that day, too, that I realized that Thanksgiving was almost here again. Somehow. Surely it hadn’t been over a year since my man asked me to be his bride? Blink. Wait, how could it be just a year ago. Longer, surely much longer ago than that.

One thing was sure, though. It was snowing at last, and as I stood there, admiring the way that God turns barrenness into beauty, a parade of memories began to march, or perhaps tumble through my mind, bringing alive the “old days” now past in of some of the Christmas Classics that cannot leave off from echoing through my memory’s hall.

It really does sometimes seem like yesterday, especially as these first snows of winter fall, that I danced  around the house with my brother and sister  while we sang a bit  of “Let it Snow” in anticipation of those first Alaskan snowflakes (though I wonder now that we weren’t singing something else- such as “snow, snow go away, come again some other day”, long as those winters felt sometimes!) and then  fell down on our backs on the lawn, laughing, and trying to catch the first snowflakes on our tongues.

Though snow usually fell long before Christmas, and often long before Thanksgiving, there was something about the snows before Christmas that seemed extra special then, and now even more so.  Those fires in the fireplace in my childhood home (fueled by wood that we’d spent the few months of summer gathering from our own acreage) are now replaced with fires in the pellet stove in my new living room, and yet the warm, glowing light remind me of those cozy home fires and I hear my brother’s voice all over again, singing as only he could do, about those chestnuts we never did get to roast on our open fires (and that I still dream of doing…some Christmas season, if and when I can find some chestnuts).  Jack-frost nipping at our noses and anywhere else he could nip (ever have your eyelashes freeze shut? I have!), and dressing like Eskimos (I wore a kuspuk quite often as a child) were reality for us, but somehow it was those chestnuts we always thought about.

I  can still  hear that particular crunch of dry, powder snow  as it is trampled underfoot, and feel the icy wind  biting at my nose and cheeks again as we walked from house to house around the neighborhood- and farther- keeping that beautiful tradition of caroling alive and sharing a little of our Christmastime joy with strangers.  I hear the Drummer Boy (Johnny Manthis, once again accompanied by my brother), and remember understanding for the first time what it meant to “give my best to Him” who was born to die so that I could live.

I still feel the chills down my spine and the threat of tears every time I hear it that I felt that first time I stood and heard the Hallelujah Chorus live in an old church in Anchorage as a 9 year old. Only now I  sing along, and imagine that in Heaven, the Angels must be singing too.

But while I think of the beautiful blessings remembered last Thanksgiving to this one just past, and while I write my Christmas greetings to the people near to my heart though scattered around this old earth,  and glance out my little window at the picture of my world- a world just now turning white, unlike the world of my childhood- it is Bing Crosby whose voice floats into my mind, and memory after memory of happy, carefree childhood white winter days come with it, when the snow was already quite deep, and  the only kind of Christmas I ever knew were  always white. I’m dreaming of a White Christmas.

I’m dreaming of a white Christmas
Just like the ones I used to know
Where the treetops glisten,
and children listen
To hear sleigh bells in the snow

Happy, beautiful, white Christmases. Days  filled with family, love, rejoicing and thankfulness for the gift of God’s Son to make our hearts “whiter than snow”. These were days to give, to share, to sing and be still and know Him. To hear the snowflakes fall, and the winter birds sing. Tree tops always glistened and once or twice, we did hear the sleigh bells ringing through the cold air and the snow crunching under horse foot, fulfilling a childish desire to really go sleigh riding. These are some of my heart’s happiest memories.

Thanksgiving is past now, and the air is even more chilly than before, and there is snow on the ground- and it seems to be here to stay. Yet, still through my mind the memories, and the songs echo keeping those memories of Christmases of the past fresh, and the happiness, that real joy that comes from sharing, and the reason why I always dream of “white Christmases” is alive just as it was when I was a child.

Life changes just as the seasons come and go. This year my siblings are far away, my family scattered like autumn leaves, married, expecting little ones, unable to make the trips to all be back together again.  It won’t be just like the Christmas times I’ve known before. It’ll be my first…away from home, but at home, where I’d rather be than anywhere else, at the side of the man I love more than anyone else in this world. I’m looking forward to creating our own memories to tuck into my treasure chest in Memory’s hall.

But I’m still dreaming of a White Christmas- not just a snowy, white Christmas,  but the kind of happiness that White Christmases always have been to my heart… a Christmas as filled with love and joy and thankfulness, with sharing, with quiet moments to soak in the reality of what the world somehow has commercialized into a mere shadow of what it ought to be… and somehow I think this Christmas will be more beautiful than any I’ve ever known.

I’m looking forward to a cozy fire, to the Christmas Greetings from friends and family that make every day cheery when I see them in a little (but growing!) line on our window sill, a happy home filled with the music of the season, a few special foods, and  lots of quiet moments truly seeking to grasp the ultimate gift ever given- our Savior, and to be still in our hearts and know Him.

It isn’t the gifts, it isn’t the food, it isn’t the place or the people, or the snow that make my Christmas White- though they make it happy indeed, and the memories even more beautiful and special- it is the simple joys and the happiness that comes from inside that will always be my white Christmas, no matter where I am, and even if I am all alone.

Whether you “celebrate” Christmas, Hanukkah or neither, from our home to yours…

May your days be merry and bright
And may all your Christmases be white.

God bless each of you this season, exceedingly, abundantly above all that you ask, think or even imagine. Happy White Christmas, this year and always.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

I laughed.

I was beyond exhausted, more than glowing from the humidity I was unused to, and not feeling in the least bit cute.

“No,” I had to answer Fairlight honestly.  Sometimes, if you caught me at just the right moment, with just the perfect cute maternity top on, I explained, I might feel cute.  But more often than not, I was tired, hot, and feeling as though my clothes did not fit right (but when it’s the third outfit of the morning, if it at least goes on, one finally has to give up).

I’m seven months pregnant with our second little one now.  In between pregnancies I spent all my time looking at those cute pregnant ladies and feeling those maternal longings to have a little one growing there beneath my heart again.  Nowadays I again look at those pregnant ladies and feel an instant bond—the waddle, the exhausted but glowing look we all share.

But when my sister-in-law Megan asked, “Do you still like being pregnant?” my answer was a resounding yes.  As precious as it is to hold a nursing babe in your arms, there’s nothing quite like the constant tapping of baby feet inside your belly.  Ruth Ann wasn’t very many months old before I was already missing having my baby always with me, right there inside me.  My answer to Megan was easy: I love being pregnant.  Even if I don’t often feel like a cute pregnant lady.

The problem is, I don’t think being pregnant is any excuse for being more frumpy than usual.  Even if comfy is a valid necessity.  It seems to me a husband will soon be less inclined to want more children if he considers the fact that he will once again have to look at a fat, frumpy wife for nine months or more!  There may not be much I can do about the fat part (though I can do my best to keep the fat in all the right “pregnant” places!), but I can work on dressing as cute as possible just for him (and the other people like Fairlight and my non-pregnant self who think pregnant ladies look cuter than they feel!).  Not to mention getting as much rest as I can so I don’t always look as exhausted as I feel!

This second time around, my maternity wardrobe has continued to slowly expand (no pun intended!).  There seems to be slightly more selection out there this time around.  But even Wal-mart seems to have bought into the notion that fewer women are having babies these days and thus only about half a rack of maternity clothes is necessary.  Not that I’ve bought maternity clothes at Wal-mart.  But I’ve been close to that desperate.  J.C. Penney has seemed to have the nicest selection, quality, and the best sales on new maternity clothes.  But I did just finally find a few shirts at Motherhood Maternity with a style and price I liked (and why did it take me so long to discover their “tummy sleeve”?—it keeps my pants up and makes sure everything “meets in the middle”!).

Truth be told, as usual, GoodWill has been my favorite maternity store of choice.  It’s just taken an awfully long time to gather maternity clothes that fit me—and that I like to wear!  There seemed to be a trend there for a while of making maternity shirts as short as regular shirts, just wider.  Now they are longer, but just as tight as every other teen girl’s shirt—showing off every extra curve that pregnancy gives one!  But it’s finally dawned on me that it would be the rare store I could walk into, even with unlimited resources, and find an entire regular wardrobe in one day.  So how did I expect to collect a “specialty” wardrobe of maternity clothes so quickly?  It’s only taken 18 months (and those few shirts I bought in between pregnancies—shh, don’t tell!) to collect the repertoire I have now.  Especially since, not being very pregnant in the summertime with Ruth, I’ve discovered this time around that some of those maternity shirts I found at GoodWill that first summer were not long enough to cover a seven month baby belly!

So take heart, first-time expectant moms.  You will spend most of the next nine months trying on at least three outfits each day and complaining that nothing fits like it did last week. You most likely won’t feel like you have any selection in your maternity wardrobe until you’ve shopped through at least the second or third pregnancy.  But being a happily expectant mom—who everyone else thinks is so cute—more than makes up for the lack of outfits to choose from.  And never forget that it doesn’t matter what we look like to the rest of the world—our husband’s eyes, our husband’s taste in maternity clothes is all that matters.  After all, I am his beauty—the woman he chose to be the mother of his children.  And I never want to make him regret that for a single moment.

Oh, and that part about being barefoot and pregnant?  Not recommended.  All that extra tummy weighs heavy on the feet.  It’s a much happier thing to be pregnant with Birkenstocks on your feet!

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

Set-Apart Femininity is not a book that makes the reader comfortable.  But the message rings true when compared to God’s Word.

Unlike Leslie Ludy’s first book for girls, Authentic Beauty-which, while I wholeheartedly agreed with its premise, I felt gave too many graphic examples of impurity in a book about purity-Set-Apart Femininity goes straight to the heart of the message.

Leslie’s question is this: “Is Jesus Christ merely a part of your life?  Or is He your entire life?“ (pg. 96).  Using unforgettable stories of women like Sabina Wurmbrand, Leslie shows clearly how far our typical Christian lives are from being set apart for Him.  The chapter on decorum is filled with questions to help you evaluate how you spend your time, who and what really has a claim on your life.

The book is worth buying just for the chapter on the design of beauty.  Leslie cuts straight to the heart of today’s popular message for Christian women on self-worth and beauty, showing it for the self-centered ugliness it is.  Yes, she agrees, our feminine desire is to be found beautiful, to be that princess we always dreamed of:

“But the solution presented, all too often, does not flow from the true Gospel of Jesus Christ.  Why?  Because it keeps self alive.  It convinces us that we can look inward and find worth, beauty, and value within ourselves.  It keeps the focus on us; on our feelings, our attributes, and our beauty…

“It is not our unique beauty that must shine for this world to see.  It is not our own beauty that we must discover and embrace-it is His… The secret to becoming the beautiful…princess…is forgetting all about self and becoming completely consumed with only one thing-Jesus Christ.” (pg. 45, 47)

And then there’s the chapter on prayer-on cultivating a real, vibrant, every-moment relationship with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  Leslie makes a clear case that “our problem is not that we expect too much of God, but that we expect far too little of Him” (pg. 128).  Rather convicting when coupled with Leslie’s description of the abundant hope and life we can and should have in Him: “Not day to day surviving, but day to day thriving” (pg. 127).

Of course, the book wouldn’t be written by a Ludy without some great stuff on romance and guy-girl relationships.  Like about how our generation doesn’t need lower expectations of marriage, but higher ones.  (And I can only say amen to that!  Watch for my review of The First 90 Days of Marriage, which is the Ludy’s entire book about that very subject.)  But Leslie brings our thoughts of ardor and mystique back to the center of where they should be with this:

“If you ever catch yourself ‘putting off’ happiness until you finally get married or thinking that when you finally meet your spouse all of your dreams will be fulfilled, that’s a sign that Christ hasn’t fully captured your heart.  If Jesus Christ isn’t enough right now, then He won’t be enough after marriage either.  And you’ll always be seeking fulfillment from the wrong things-setting your marriage up for disillusionment and tension.” (pg. 185)

If you really read it, Set-Apart Femininity can challenge to the core the way you live your life.  It doesn’t take a very long look around to see that we need Christians to live up to their name now, more than ever.  As another favorite author of mine, Josh Harris, always used to say: “This country will not survive another generation of Christians that fit in.”

The only way to be a part of the counter culture is to be set apart.  The only way to be truly feminine is to be set apart.  The only way to be a radiant princess, a daughter of the King, a child of God is to be set apart.

Read Set-Apart Femininity.  Visit setapartgirl.com.  And together, let’s live set apart lives for Him.

P.S. Congratulations to Leslie and her husband on the Father’s Day arrival of their newest little girl…another one to be set apart for Him!

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

Words are a feeble way to capture the power of a day like this. It was a day of innocent beauty and pure joy. We had an absolutely wonderful experience celebrating with Chantel and her new husband. Few pleasures in this life equal that of seeing a friend uniting herself to her best friend for life to the glory of God.

Having the privilege of walking down life’s road the past few years, seeing how God has led her and brought her into this new season of goodness and intimacy is awe-inspiring. Chantel is the real thing; everything she writes in her articles has been learned in the intensity of the fire and God has used it to purify her, His daughter, into gold. All I can do is praise God and be amazed. He is so good.

I’m also savoring every last minute with these precious girlfriends who I am blessed to have in my life. Ashleigh, April, Chantel and Gretchen are some of the best friends anyone could hope for.

We serve an awesome, loving God who delights to give good gifts to His children. And today He gave two young people to each other to have, to hold, to love, and to cherish. Praise be to Him who gives, who takes away, whose name is blessed forever.

Scott and Chantel, Ashleigh, April, Natalie, & Gretchen

Photography copyright 2009 Bethany Tiss

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

Then the if onlys start in.
If only I was thinner.
If only I my hair had more body.
If only I was a little taller.
If only I was shorter.
If only I was more petite.
If only my teeth were whiter.
If only my eyelashes were thicker.
If only…if only…if only…if only…

Don’t you ever wish there was some kind of physical Christmas where we could get “presents” in the form of changes to our bodies? 5 pounds knocked off here…blonde hair or blue eyes thrown in over there. How about an amazing natural tan that never wore off in the winter? Maybe that’s what God will give me from my physical wish list next time around!

How God must sigh to hear his beloved children fret so. I sometimes wonder if He longs to break those mirrors and shred our silly fashion magazines. Trust Me! I can hear Him saying. I designed you in your mother’s womb…every pore of your being crafted according to my flawless blueprint. You are Mine and I love you. You are my child and you are beautiful.

And yet we listen to the carnal voices, and allow empty words to drown out this ageless love. In 1665, an English pamphlet recommended that women “bleed” themselves drastically (from their right arm in the spring and left arm in the autumn) to maintain slimness. So often my friends and I have gasped in shock over these and other weird horror stories. How could women wear corsets so tight they fainted? Or Chinese women up until the 1940’s bind their feet until they turned into tiny little hoofs, in accord with their culture’s definition of beauty? Who would do something so restricting and destructive to themselves?

And yet we are the same way. Are we blind to our own failings? When I think of the number of times I’ve skipped meals or stayed up late to work out, I see that I am no better. The question is –how can we be so afraid of ugliness that we would torture our bodies in order to match the latest societal norm? The mirror tells us one thing, our minds another, and the media gives us no rest.

These confining regulations are held to us by society. God’s Word contains none of this. Rather, He comforts us with the gentle reminder in Psalm 139, “…You knitted me together in my mother’s womb…I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made…my frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the depths of the earth.” And He lovingly rebukes our wrong focus by stating His true and timeless standard in Proverbs 31:30, “Charm is deceitful and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.”

Our Father knows our limitations. He understands that culture’s call to physical perfection is impossible. No one is “flawless.” Not the most beautiful model, not the most glamorous starlet. 95% of the pictures you see in those fashion catalogs and magazines have been edited and manipulated by a computer program. We all have insecurities and “defects.” No one is exempt.

But enough of the problems. You already know of them, because they exist inside all of us. What is the solution? What is the answer we so desperately need? I am reminded of the words of an old hymn.

Turn your eyes upon Jesus,
Look full in His wonderful face,
And the things of earth will grow strangely dim
In the light of His glory and grace.

That, I think, is the answer. It is so simple and yet so powerful. We must get our eyes off of ourselves and onto Jesus Christ. The answer to contentment is not losing weight or finding the perfect make-up products or dressing just right. It is not heightened self-esteem or being around people who make you feel good about yourself.

You will find contentment when you focus on Jesus Christ and on Him alone.

This is a hard task. It is not something you will learn overnight. It is a journey; a long, long journey, and like your Christian walk, some days will be better than others. There will be high mountains on this pilgrimage…times when you are so close to God you can feel His breath on Your face…and then there will be valleys, dark places where you can neither see God nor feel His love. Those are the times when you will feel a loneliness inside of you, and a restlessness, a longing to taste the slop of the world and a derision towards the feast of heaven. Then you must walk by faith and not by sight, because your perspective is clouded. You must keep going and trust that soon you will come to the level places and to a richer understanding of Him. You must keep placing one foot in front of the other, knowing that soon, you will return to your sweet walk with your Savior.

Like Peter, you must keep your eyes on Jesus. When you stop focusing on the Lord, the turbulent waves of this world will threaten to pull you under. But fix your gaze on Him and you will walk above those waves in a way that the unsaved world cannot fathom.

Don’t compare yourself to the faces and bodies held up to you as ideal. Be the beautiful child of God that He has made you to be, by comparing your heart to His. Don’t give credence to those feelings of jealousy. And don’t entertain “if onlys”! Send them out the door without a by-your-leave! God made you exactly as He wanted to, and He loves you. What more can you ask for? The fleeting admiration of fickle man? That is nothing compared to the supremacy of Christ’s love, the constancy of His friendship, and the richness of His affection.

Look ahead. Look beyond the passing present. Charm is deceitful…beauty is vain. The appearance of the most gorgeous woman will deteriorate. But a heart devoted to God has a lasting legacy.

There is nothing wrong with beauty. God created it, and He created us to appreciate it. But there is everything wrong with dwelling on beauty, idolizing beauty, and valuing external beauty above all else.

Look to Jesus. Allow Him to calm the storms of your heart, and keep your eyes on Him. Everything else will fade in that light.

Keely B. is a 16 year-old California country girl. She loves Jesus, her friends and her big family of nine. Besides writing, Keely enjoys horseback riding, sports, reading, playing the fiddle and listening to country music. She is the editor of Apples of Gold E-Magazine and also runs Sisters Keepers, a brand new blog for Christian girls.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

Edie still had her Christmas wreath on the door—fresh and yet fragrant it was too lovely to take down. I gazed at it rather mournfully, luxuriating a bit in my post-holiday blues. But before I had a chance to knock the door swung open, and there stood Edie, smiling in her radiantly gentle way, and beyond her, Ashley and Debra, waiting to receive me with hugs and smiles of their own. Is there any medicine on earth so potent as the embrace of a friend?

I forgot my headache. I dismissed my Janu-weary mood, for what place had it in this little sanctuary of beauty and warmth? The 1920’s bungalow was aglow with candlelight, and soft French music lilted through the rooms. A collective gasp went up at the sight of our table, for a more daintily feminine array cannot be imagined. There were place cards (with appropriately deco script), and the damask cloth was laid with every possible accouterment for a ladies’ tea: antique china, vintage silver, a tiered cake plate boasting everything from homemade scones to macaroons and melt-in-your-mouth truffles. On the sideboard stood enticing decanters of chilled lemonade, with crystal goblets at the ready. And everywhere I cast my eye, it seemed, were sweet little bottles and vases of pink and white spray roses. Pretty as a Valentine; proper as an English tea room.

Edie brought out the soup course while I poured the tea, and then we fell to the feast of fellowship with as much relish as we polished off the roasted red pepper soup, and the mushroom and pine nut quiche that followed. Our conversation took a delightfully meandering course, as it only can in the hands of like-minded ladies. We discussed everything from organic gardening to vacuum cleaners, touching on politics, homeschooling and needlepoint, each in their turn.

But over all our talk, it seemed, a shining mantle was cast, a high vision of beauty’s worth that infused every subject with a strange sort of lowly nobility. Time and again we came back to one of the tenets of our homemaker’s hearts: the value and validity of loveliness. The power of beauty, in its simplest and purest sense, to speak audibly of the presence of Jesus Christ in our lives. Beauty is of Him, from Him, for Him. Beauty has a language that transcends even the finest words, that soars above our sweetest experiences in this life and whispers to our souls of what heaven will be.

Debra and Ashley are painters, artists in both life and craft. It has been beautiful for me to watch the former inspire and instruct the latter, pouring herself out, as it were, to the enrichment of a friend’s creative world. As a homeschooling mother of three, Debra could easily justify the forestallment of her own artistic desires. But instead, she’s set an example for the three of us childless women not to deny the significance of our own unique and God-given talents, even in the whirl of a houseful of teenagers. Creativity is a hidden spring, feeding the deep wells of our personalities. And when that spring is tended, unclogged and running true, cups of cold water in His name abound. We give of ourselves, because there is something there to give.

Ashley has approached the discipline of oils with courage and joy (almost she makes me want to paint…not quite. I’m not that brave!). I love to go into her house and see a new work in progress lying on the dining room table, or to catch that light that comes into her eyes when she’s describing some technique that Debra’s entrusted to her. Ashley doesn’t want to have her works in the Met, or even make a living off her paintbrush. She wants beautiful things of her own making on the walls of her home; she wants to give gifts that are indeed a portion of herself. When one considers that her whole life is a gift, that being around her is one of the most energizing occupations I can think of, it appears that the hours spent mixing paints and poring over a canvas are a perfectly natural and even necessary replenishment for her.

Into the midst of all our high talk that afternoon, Ashley slipped an analogy she’d heard in a sermon that caught my fancy in a compelling way. She gave us a picture of our callings: Some of us are tiny watercolor brushes, with only a few strands, intended for the most delicate of detail work. And the range goes all the way up to those big industrial paint rollers that can cover a whole wall in minutes. If you asked a watercolor brush to coat the side of a building it would be a disaster that ended in despair. And a paint roller would wreak havoc upon a little violet in a cut glass vase. Is the paint roller more important, more valid, because it covers a greater area with speed and efficiency? Is a Winsor & Newton more extraordinary merely because it is able to capture the rare beauties of life that might otherwise have been trodden underfoot? We all know the answer—in our heads. Both have their place and their job to do. And it’s a job that is certainly never going to get done by looking around at the other brushes nearby and comparing oneself to their bristle size and handle length. Or their subject matter, for that. And just as an artist will rifle through many brushes in the creation of one painting, we will doubtless find that the Master Painter will bring varying sizes of implements to bear upon the living landscapes we’re all creating, day in and day out.

And, if you happen to be a watercolor brush, don’t be mistaken in thinking that you cannot have a far-reaching impact in this world for beauty and truth. In a recent (and umpteenth!) viewing of the movie Miss Potter, I was struck by something she said regarding her own art: “I’m not very good at landscapes,” with a somewhat regretful glance over a sweep of Lake District loveliness. But Beatrix Potter was good at animals. And charming little stories that revealed their dignity to untold numbers of children the world over. She did not set out to write the best-selling children’s books of all time, or to almost single-handedly save the Lake District. She was just brave enough to be good at what she was good at. And there’s not a one of us alive who should not be grateful to her for it.

In like manner, Edie was merely living in her gifts that day. Hospitality, gentleness and grace; the touch of an artist upon her table and the rooms of her home. She gave of herself in that little luncheon for four, and created an environment for edification to flourish. It took time and great care, and a painterly attention to detail. (And if she wasn’t the immaculately tidy housekeeper I know her to be, I’d say she was still washing dishes!) She refreshed us from a source both deep and true, and I feel safe in assuming that she was refreshed in the process. This is beauty’s seal and signature: a mutual joy and a glory to God.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

Some of the list I’ve thoroughly digested, but far too many titles I’ve but the smallest acquaintance with. Thus I’ve chosen some of the top books Allen and Reynolds listed to tackle in the near future. I’m a bit intimidated but also determined. If I can consume over 15,000 pages of material on a single subject (yes, I admit it, I did!) in the last several months, then I can certainly press through 1000 or so pages of Cervantes or Dostevsky. Right?

I’ve set a challenge for myself that I know is do-able, but will stretch me. My hope is to have finished these books before the end of 2008. Would any of you like to join me in reading? Almost all of the books mentioned are available online so purchasing the book is optional. If anyone wants to join in, I’d enjoy the company.

The Challenge: Choose ten books which will stretch you, preferably from either Hugh Hewitt’s list or something similar (more ideas below). Comment or email me your list. Anyone who makes a list and makes it through even part of it can share what they learned, what they liked, etc. Every month I can post an update on how everyone is doing. Some of you will likely put me to shame, considering how distracted I get with other things these days.

I have to admit, Brothers Karamazov is what scares me the most right now. It’s so…long. For anyone who remains unconvinced about the worth of such a huge time investment (not to mention such a huge amount of mental work!), David Allen White commented on why we should read the great books of history:

But one of the things I, at least, think most people should do in the time that they spend on this planet, is have a sense of the greatest that’s been given to us. A life itself is the greatest gift, to have an immortal soul is extraordinary, but in beginning to understand what that means, I think you’ve got to turn to the greatest writers who can give you some sense of what it’s all been about, why you’re here, what it means and where you’re going. And that means you’ve got to delve into the great writers.

JM Reynolds’s perspective:

We need young men and women with souls that are good, true and beautiful. And if we’re going to form souls that are good, true and beautiful, we can’t begin with our own souls, because all of us are in process, too. The great writers know how to shape us morally, to get to goodness. They know how to help us find the big ideas, the truths that never change from culture to culture. And they know most importantly how to make us beautiful, so that we don’t fall into the trap of thinking only things that work matter. We need beauty in our lives as well.

We dumb down education because it’s easier to be stupid than it is to be smart. These books aren’t immediately fun to read, though they’re fun for the rest of your life in an intellectual sense. And so let’s face it, most college educators and most high school educators in particular are anti-intellectual in an intellectual field.

There are dozens of other books that can be classed among the most beautiful of all time. Below is my list of some the beautiful books I have read that are available on The Literature Network. These are the classics everyone should read at least once in a lifetime; these are the classics you cannot read just once.

Are all of the above books or my recommendations below pleasant books? Certainly not. The first time I read the first chapters of Jane Eyre I hated it. Hugo’s books are some of the most difficult reads I’ve ever attempted (but made easier if read aloud with a roommate at 2 am as we did :smile). All of these books are at your fingertips; I’ve linked to free copies online for each and every one.

Try Aesop’s Fables, Louisa May Alcott’s An Old Fashioned Girl and Little Women, Hans Christian Anderson’s The Little Match Girl, portions of Arabian Nights, Beowulf, and Jane Eyre. You must read something by Robert Browning, Emily Dickinson, O’Henry, Longfellow, Martin Luther, Tennyson, P.G. Wodehouse, and Beatrix Potter. Every girl will love Burnett’s A Little Princess and The Secret Garden (and why not the short story Sara Crewe while we are in her area?).

Read some Father Brown by Chesterton, Wilke Collins’ The Moonstone, and Robinson Crusoe and lots of Dickens: A Christmas Carol, a Tale of Two Cities, and Little Dorrit.

Some of my all-time favorites are The Three Musketeers, The Hound of the Baskervilles, Wives and Daughters, Wind in the Willows, The Hunchback of Notre Dame (Or Les Miserables), MacDonald’s most well-known classic The Princess and the Goblin, Anne of Green Gables, Polyanna, Merry Adventures of Robin Hood, Black Beauty, The Twenty-Fourth of June, Ivanhoe, Five Little Peppers, Heidi, Treasure Island, Freckles (and everything else Porter ever wrote!) and The Adventures of Tom Sawyer.

Finally, dip into Journey to the Center of the Earth and Alice in Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass (ed. I’d add the poem Jaberwocky in also). Whew!

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

Katrina writes: “Tara and I have been friends for many years, but due to the distance between our homes, we have only been able to see each other at select times throughout each year. In September of 2006, we met up again at a mutual friend’s wedding, much to our delight!

“As we visited together about the things of the Lord and the latest ministry opportunities He had given us, we discovered a like-hearted passion for investing in the lives of young ladies. Having both experienced the tremendous blessing of Godly older role models during our teen years, we shared a similar burden to faithfully pass on the baton of encouragement to younger girls now facing the choices that come with growing up….

“An idea came to me that I now know was from the Lord. What if Tara and I could join forces and host some sort of retreat, conference, or weekend event for the young ladies we knew? The event could provide edifying messages, feminine skill-building opportunities, and an atmosphere for encouraging fellowship.“

Caption: Katelin, Tara, Katrina, and Kelly, the leaders of the Maiden’s Quest retreat for young ladies.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

Aspirin Mask

Aspirin has salicylic acid in it, which comes from trees, and is good for drying up any acne outbreaks you may have. It is commonly used in face care products. The best aspirin to use is the inexpensive, uncoated aspirin. Once you find some, you need to grind it into as fine a powder as possible. (Natalie: A mortar and pestle are perfect for this) I keep my crushed aspirin in a mini-tupperware type container in the bathroom so it’s handy. The aspirin is the dry portion of your mask.

Spoon a little of your powdered aspirin into a bowl. I never measure, but I guess for a whole face, I use about 3/4 to 1 tsp. of the powder. After you do it a few times, you will figure out just how much you need. For that amount of aspirin, mix in two drops of pure 100% aloe gel, one large drop of honey, and drop or two each of lavender and tea tree essential oils. Mix that together thoroughly with your spoon, and it’s all ready. You should wash your face with warm water before using any mask, because it helps your pores open up so the mask can work deeply. Leave your mask on for at least 15 minutes, and then rinse with warm water.

I wouldn’t do the mask more than two time a week for the first couple of weeks until your skin adjusts to it. Then you can work up to probably doing it every other day if you want. On the in-between days (especially at first when you’re only doing the mask a couple of times a week), you can do a plain honey mask. Do that by just smearing plain honey on your face (and stay away from any bears or insects!) after washing, and again, leave it on for 15 minutes or more. The honey really helps to calm your skin, reduce any redness/inflammation, and make you glow.

Natalie: Wal-Mart’s pharmacy will order lavender essential oil for you. Total cost: $3.50. We found 100% aloe vera gel at Target and a mortar and pestle at the local health food/nutrition store. If you can, get local honey from a beekeeper!

Conditioning Mixture

For hair, your aloe and honey are your best friends. I keep a plastic bowl in the bathroom, and I like to squirt my conditioner in the bowl, and then mix in some honey and aloe with it. I’d say I do about two parts conditioner to one part aloe and one part honey.

The honey and aloe are great humectants, which means they help your hair absorb moisture. About once a week, I like to do an apple cider vinegar rinse after shampooing (blondes should use white vinegar, as ACV has a tendency to darken light hair), and then use my conditioner mixture. I think the ACV really helps strip up any buildup that has accumulated on my hair shaft over the week, and then the super-charged conditioner mixture can really soak in.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

We have so many posts for Valentine’s week that the blog will be quite busy. However, I do plan on sharing more about life since I sort of dropped off the face of the earth last year. The question is not if I should write but where to start?!

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

I began wearing glasses in 4^th grade. I have been a committed contact wearer since 8^th grade, which was approximately 1994. Since then, I believe I could count on my fingers how many times I have worn my glasses. And I can count on my right thumb how many new pair of glasses I have purchased. One.

Before yesterday, I despised wearing my glasses. They were silver dollar pancake sized wire rimmed glasses that I purchased sometime in high school. I honestly don’t even remember when. I only know that I bought them because I was going out of the country and I was nervous to go with just a pair of contacts. I recall that when I picked them out, I chose a pair that looked exactly like my middle school glasses. Now, anyone else would have avoided making any style decision similar to a middle school style decision. But see, I didn’t really care what they looked like because I was not planning to wear them. I was right. I honestly don’t recall a single time when I had to wear my glasses in public during my high school career.

Fast forward to college where I begin working in elementary schools to prepare for my job as a teacher. And all of the sudden, I catch pink eye. Yes, the dreaded “goopy eyed, crusty morning, itch then wash your hands to itch again” disease. I go to the health center at my university and they give me a prescription and say, “Now, wear your glasses for 7-10 days.” My heart drops. My eyes fill up with tears. I can’t imagine having to wear those awful things. For some strange reason, I remember feeling like I looked like Teddy Roosevelt, though that’s impossible because I don’t have the ability to grow a quality mustache like his. I only wore the glasses for 2 days, then popped my sweet contacts right back in and prayed that my eyes wouldn’t fall out from negligent care.

As I’ve continued in my teaching career, I’ve caught conjunctivitis, as it is called by the professionals, at least once a school year. Pretty much, if a child brings it in the building, it magically finds its way to my eyes. And every time, without fail, I have to wear those jar-lid glasses. And every time, without fail, it makes me miserable.

Then, last week I caught a virus. For some crazy reason, probably because the Lord was ready to deal with this, the virus traveled from my chest, to my throat, up my nose, and into my eyes! Who knew your eyes could catch a virus? Well, they can and they do. And mine did. And out came the wire frisbees to wear on my face.

Three days ago I wouldn’t have been able to explain to you why my glasses made me so unhappy. Because, and you’ve probably already thought this, it’s really not that big of a deal. I mean, I am the same person with glasses or contacts. Right? Wrong.

I walked into my mother’s tea shop last week. It was my sister’s birthday and we were going to a nice restaurant for dinner. I had on the glasses. I was miserable and depressed. Mom is staring at me in a funny way and then she says, “Wow, when you wear those glasses, I feel like I’m looking at middle school Annie.”

Bingo. There it is. There is the problem. I feel like middle school Annie. I did not know I could have a light bulb moment and a heartbreaking moment at the exact same time. But that is what happened. It took all I had in me not to cry right then, but the moment did take my breath away.

Because you see, when I left my glasses behind in middle school and entered the wonderful world of contacts, I think it was the start of a slow and continual process of the Lord showing me that I am beautiful. I felt so ugly in middle school. I can’t even think of a word strong enough to express how ugly I thought I was- hideous, unsightly, repulsive. Those all work, yet none of them express the heartache attached to the ugliness. Sadly enough, you probably know what I mean.

High school was the beginning of the path that led me to freedom in Christ. Freedom to believe that I am fearfully and wonderfully made and that I am seriously cute according to God’s standards and my own. For some reason, those glasses were a subconscious connection to my old heart, my old mindset, my old life. And to wear them was to walk in those old shoes again. To literally look at the world through those same eyes. Eyes that were filled with sorrow and despair and hurt. Every time I put those specs on, it was like I became that sad girl again.

A favorite scripture comes to mind.

2 Corinthians 5:17: Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come.

I knew the old had to go. I could no longer look through those eyes. The Lord and I had been through too much to keep slipping those glasses back on. Not because they were out of fashion, though they were, but because of what they represented. The old Annie. Middle school Annie who had no love for herself and no understanding of her worth to the Father.

Another scripture that I have posted in my car brings tears to my eyes even now as the Lord reminds me of it.

Deuteronomy 10:21: He is your praise; He is your God, who performed for you those great and awesome wonders you saw with your own eyes.

Hallelujah. My eyes have seen the wonders that the Lord has done for me!

So it was time to buy new glasses. First thing Friday morning, I purchased these. I adore them. They are me. They are Annie today- redeemed, loved, rescued, beautiful. They are trendy and sassy- two things which I desperately want to be but just can’t get there. But the victory is in the trying…hopefully. They represent all that I love about me and all I hope to become. The moment I tried them on at the store, I knew. These were the new ones to replace the old.

I have worn them in public without an ounce of shame for two full days now. I’ve gone to a basketball game, spoken at a retreat, and shopped at a bookstore. Never once did I question my worth or beauty. But I have caught myself staring at my own reflection. I can’t stop smiling. Above all else, I am just amazed that my heart can feel this free with such a simple change. God is all about change, all about our hearts, and all about helping us see ourselves the way He sees us. He doesn’t care how big or small the change is.

Psalm 118:23: The Lord has done this, and it is marvelous in our eyes.

I can’t believe what I’m about to say, but I’m not in a rush to get back into my contacts. I may wear these glasses for 7-10 days…at least.

- by Annie F. Downs

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

The Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood published a piece back in November which gave its own boat-rocking opinions and insights. The bottom line?

“This method of drawing theological conclusions is flawed and therefore results in flawed views of both God and woman. We must guard against any view of God that is unworthy of Him. While an idea of God may subtly veer from truth and may appeal to our emotions, we must discern the flawed method that surely has profound ramifications. Not only does our view of God determine the priorities and trajectory of our lives, but our very purpose is to know Him. To know him, we must seek him where he has most clearly revealed himself.”

Christianity Today stepped out last week with a piece of their own. It did my heart good to see it. Not because I agree with everything, but because such a wide-spread bestselling book with such obvious theological flaws should not be passed by without comment.

CT’s conclusion on beauty is worth quoting at length (read the whole piece here)

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

This whole thought process on beauty began after my last post with the link to Lanier’s blog…after posting, I decided to go read some more of her writings. They remind me quite a bit of L.M. Montgomery’s writings (for those who don’t know, she wrote the Anne of Green Gables series, etc.)…similar writing styles, both generate a satisfied sigh on the completion of reading, and both celebrate the beautiful. Of course, not at all in a pagan and worshipful way…but more with realizing that “beautiful” is just another word for “lovely” in Philippians 4:8, “Finally, brethren, whatever things are true, whatever things are noble, whatever things are just, whatever things are pure, whatever things are lovely, whatever things are of good report, if there is any virtue and if there is anything praiseworthy—meditate on these things.”

I think that many Christians are mistaken in subconsciously thinking that beauty is “carnal” or “of the flesh”. This view, though erroneous in my opinion, is rather justifiable when you see how much the idea of beauty has been perverted by our culture. But…I believe that true beauty…summed up nicely in the Philippians 4:8 quoted above…is NOT carnal and should be an integral part of a Christian’s life (as is evidenced by the “…meditate on these things.” part of the verse).

In the traveling I’ve done, I’ve seen many idols worshipped, both visible and unseen. And I have yet to see an idol that is in any way lovely…many are incredibly ugly! Countless times I’ve been so thankful to the Lord that He is beautiful…because He is, that’s undeniable. There are several references in the Bible to “the beauty of the Lord”….but even if you didn’t have that, you need only look at His creation.

Genesis 1 tells us of the creation of this world. Along with other details, it recounts that every so often, the Creator looked at His work and “saw that is was good” (Genesis 1:10, 12, 18, 21, 25, 31 ["very good"]). In the original Hebrew, that word “good” meant a multitude of things…”good, pleasant, beautiful, excellent, lovely, delightful”. His creation was “good” and it was beautiful. Granted, we now live in a sinful world that has tainted the original loveliness of the Lord’s creation, but many times we can catch an tiny yet exquisite glimpse of the our God’s beauty through His creation. It’s found in the delicacy of a lily-of-the-valley…in the awe-inspiring splendor of a sunset…in the tranquility of a hidden meadow covered with freshly-fallen snow. You can see it in the magnificene of true love….a baby’s laugh…good food. Our Lord’s many facets of beauty…” La vie est belle”…life IS beautiful.

But life is beautiful only because it’s a reflection of our precious Lord Jesus. Yet, amazingly, it’s only a pale reflection…oh so very pale…because “For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then face to face” (1 Cor. 13:12a). But then face to face….what glorious splendoer, what awesome beauty. Words seem so paltry, even in thought…what is there to say? ….what is there to do? …but fall on my face and worship…oh that glorious day.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.

©2010 Young Ladies Christian Fellowship. All Rights Reserved.