Her question completely startled me, and my mind raced to come up with an answer–any answer! I gave a rather lame response, but it was obvious that I wasn’t purposely doing anything for myself apart from my kids.
She went on to show me various projects she had going “for herself,” and we left pretty soon after that.
A couple weeks have passed, and I find myself still thinking about her question.
There are many things I’d love to do in life. I’d love to travel. It would be nice to be able to meet friends for lunch without juggling a restless baby boy or quieting a rambunctious girl! I have been eager to sew a quilt and some dresses for Emma. I have hobbies and interests just like everyone else.
Yet I realized something a while ago when I got my sewing machine down from the closet and dusted it off. This is not my season for big, time-consuming projects. Hobbies and interests can wait. Life’s greatest investments are before me in the form of my husband and two children. Their lives, their futures, their destinies are being molded by me, with God, for better or for worse.
Is it wrong to pursue interests or hobbies? Or to seek out “me time”? Certainly not, if I have the time and right motives in doing so. But should it be my focus? And if I don’t get the “me time” I feel entitled to, will I grow dissatisfied?
There will be a time when my nest is empty, and I’ll have time to pursue other interests. Right now, my time is being consumed with the more important, with my God-given responsibilities of being a wife and raising these precious little ones. And wondrously, in this process of putting myself aside, and “losing my identity” as so many women fear, I am actually finding Life.
9 Comments
Amain! Finally! You are so right! It’s sad how many advice givers out there are missing the true joys of child raising/loving! Thank you for holding up the banner of true motherhood. It would be great for many young and old wives and mothers to remember your last two sentances.
Beautiful answer.
So, so true. There is a death in this season… a death to us, a death to our wants but it is in that death that there is life.
The new site looks great!
Blessings.
I have, written inside the cover of my Bible, a reminder to myself…
Remember always how the Lord works,
for what appears to be defeat is oft times victory,
and what may look like dry bones will rise up as a mighty army
and in death we actually find life.
may you continue to find the abundant life that He promised you!
I loved the years I devoted to my four sons as they grew up and, like you, I didn’t really do much else. That time and effort paid off. I now have four adult sons, each of whom is “cool” in his own way, and who have stretched me much by sharing their interests with me. Their growing-up years go by fast. Time enough when they’re less dependent on you for you to stretch your wings and explore other interests. May God bless your time with these little ones.
Excellent…really brings things into perspective. Thank-you!
Very good question! You expressed it so well. I don’t see a problem with having hobbies or needing a break, but I don’t really like the language of “me time” or being “entitled” that people (even well-meaning) use. Somehow it seems a little cynical.
I think what you said about seasons and focus is right on. I hope that when I’m a mother I will follow your example!
It’s great to hear from “MommyLand,” Skye! We have all missed your wit and humor. Lovely to hear of your growing babies!
Amen to that, Skye! I’m so happy for you
It’s so true; your efforts will be well rewarded.
And I can’t wait until…someday…when I can enter that stage of life myself!
It will be worth it all.
God Bless!