If it ain’t caffeinated, it ain’t coffee!

Definition:
Coffee, n.
break fluid.

No coffee can be good in the mouth that does not first send a sweet offering of odour to the nostrils.
-Henry Ward Beecher

A morning without coffee is like sleep.
-Author Unknown

The morning cup of coffee has an exhilaration about it which the cheering influence of the afternoon or evening cup of tea cannot be expected to reproduce. -Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr., “Over the Teacups,” 1891

Decaffeinated coffee is the devil’s blend.
-Author Unknown

Sleep is a symptom of caffeine deprivation.
-Author Unknown

Decaffeinated coffee is kind of like kissing your sister.
-Bob Irwin

Chocolate, men, coffee – some things are better rich.
-Author Unknown

The whole purpose of places like Starbucks is for people with no decision-making ability whatsoever to make six decisions just to buy one cup of coffee. Short, tall, light, dark, caf, decaf, low-fat, non-fat, etc. So people who don’t know what they’re doing or who on earth they are can, for only $2.95, get not just a cup of coffee but an absolutely defining sense of self: Tall. Decaf. Cappuccino.
-Joe Fox in “You’ve Got Mail”

Behind every successful woman… is a substantial amount of coffee.
-Stephanie Piro

Actually, this seems to be the basic need of the human heart in nearly every great crisis – a good hot cup of coffee.
-Alexander King

“Could you use a little cream in your coffee?”
“When I drink coffee, I drink coffee; and when I drink milk, I drink milk.”
-William Glaser’s adaptation of the following lines from “The Quiet Man”
Mary Kate Danaher: Could you use a little water in your whiskey?
Michaleen Flynn: When I drink whiskey, I drink whiskey; and when I drink water, I drink water.

Over second and third cups flow matters of high finance, high state, common gossip and low comedy. [Coffee] is a social binder, a warmer of tongues, a soberer of minds, a stimulant of wit, a foiler of sleep if you want it so. From roadside mugs to the classic demi-tasse, it is the perfect democrat.
-Author Unknown

“There’s more to life than Dutch Bros. Coffee. There’s also Starbucks.”
-Will Glaser

Coffee leads men to trifle away their time, scald their chops, and spend their money, all for a little base, black, thick, nasty, bitter, stinking nauseous puddle water.
-The Women’s Petition Against Coffee, 1674

Coffee makes us severe, and grave, and philosophical.
-Jonathan Swift

This coffee falls into your stomach, and straightway there is a general commotion. Ideas begin to move like the battalions of the Grand Army of the battlefield, and the battle takes place. Things remembered arrive at full gallop, ensuing to the wind. The light cavalry of comparisons deliver a magnificent deploying charge, the artillery of logic hurry up with their train and ammunition, the shafts of with start up like sharpshooters. Similes arise, the paper is covered with ink; for the struggle commences and is concluded with torrents of black water, just as a battle with powder.
-Honore de Balzac, “The Pleasures and Pains of Coffee”

Given enough coffee, I could rule the world.
-Author Unknown

I think if I were a woman I’d wear coffee as a perfume.
-John Van Druten

Thanks to http://www.quotegarden.com/coffee.html for the quotations.