Thoughts written for September 6th, by Jennifer W.
Even at age two, God blessed me with natural maternal instinct and domestic interests. This was in turn a blessing for Mom as I was helping to feed and diaper my baby sister when I was 4 or 5 (and yes, my mom used cloth diapers and pins!).
I suppose it was only natural that I chose to be a teacher. I don’t remember needing to take any time at all to decide what I wanted to do; I had been working with children from the time I was a child myself so when it came time to enter university, I applied for a place in the College of Education. Though I went to school to be a teacher, I had always longed for the role of mother.
Clearly, in order to be a mother, a father is also needed. So, more importantly, I supposed I would have also been married by now. I would have been a bride of youthful energy, ready to create a beautiful and welcoming home for my husband, filled with a few adorable children who would all be raised well-mannered and healthy.
But, Yahweh has had a different plan. As the One Who knows the beginning from the end, He knew my heart needed much work and re-shaping during those “youthful, energetic” years. Though occasionally I do feel as if time has been wasted, I recognize the infinite wisdom of the Deity; that He knows what He is doing in His time.
There is more to wifehood and motherhood than my childhood and youthful perception understood. So much more. In order to be a good mother, I must get to know my Heavenly Father and familiarize myself with His character. I must learn to love Him and His ways above all else. Learn to truly love others, to be patient and longsuffering. Oh how I would need to be strong in the goodness of the Lord in order to raise well-mannered children!
My trust in Yahweh has become more real and sturdy within the last few years. Nothing of eternal value comes of our own doing – it is only through God that we can do anything. I now understand that a home is not merely a visually appealing place to be kept in spotless order at all times, but a haven of love and safe habitation for growth and immersion in the Word of God. Children who may be placed in my care are not to be objects of pride, but opportunities to manifest the image of Yahweh. All is done through the LORD’s strength and mercy and none of my own ability as I had so foolishly believed in years past.
Why have I not yet been blessed with the role of “wife” and “mother”? My youthful years are quickly fleeting away. Maybe God has been preparing me instead for the return of His son, to be a part of the Bride of Christ, in ways not possible had I indeed become a temporal bride in my youth. Maybe God would like to transform me into becoming a bride of wisdom and grace.
Rather than being a wife set in her own way, desiring everything to be “perfect” through her own doing and then learning the harsh truth of reality after it is too late, God has spared me and given me the gift of Time. These years have not been wasted. No, there are many things to learn. It is now my prayer and my desire to be a virtuous wife, willing to pour myself into the life of my husband, becoming one as his companion on the short journey toward the Kingdom.
Hindsight always provides clear vision. I am very thankful that God has allowed me these years as an unmarried Sister in Christ to grow and be sharpened in His ways. My childhood wish of becoming a mother will not fade, but I can continue to become patient. The development of characteristics that make up a good wife and mother can take a lifetime. Even after marriage, it is a continual process of improvement and trusting in God, no matter the level of preparation we have been blessed with beforehand.
At 27 years of age, can I be found more suitable and prepared to be a bride than when I first entered the marriageable age? I can only hope. However, if God would like to offer me to a man as a wise and gracious bride… well, there is no rush after all. There is still much work to be done.
“a haven of love and safe habitation for growth and immersion in the Word of God” – I like that. How very inspiring!
Thank you for this.
Thank you Jennifer for writing this for us. It was an encouragement to me. Yes, we as single ladies have a lot of learning to do and I too am grateful for the time that He has given me to learn those many lessons. Someday we may be married, but we need to make the best of our single years. We have more time now to serve HIM!!!
Happy 27th birthday!!!!
Sarah
I am 27, wondering where my husband is as well. A bridesmaid four times (there’s no saying for that one!) and attending my third wedding this year in a couple of months. I believe God is faithful even when we don’t know His reasons for our extended season of singleness. It’s good to know there are others in my situation who are also waiting on God and living their life fully in the meantime.
After all the articles I’ve read, and conversations I’ve had lately with young people who are impatient to get married, it’s so nice to read a post encouraging people to be patient and wait for God’s timing. God will bring your guy or girl when He knows you’re ready. So instead of rushing into a relationship cause that’s what we wan’t, let’s be content in our singleness as God teaches us more every day!
~Joy
Thanks so much for writing this article! It is an encouragement for me to hear others speak of their desire to be a wife and mother.
Thanks for the reminder of preparing to be a bride for Christ…not just to a man here on earth.
Thanks again! God bless you.
“I must get to know my Heavenly Father and familiarize myself with His character. I must learn to love Him and His ways above all else. Learn to truly love others, to be patient and longsuffering.” thank you for this. another reason to continue to have patience and wait on the leading of God.
This post was very encouraging and inspiring. I am to be 27 in about a month and I am yet learning to rest, be patient and continue to trust in the Lord for my future. Thank you!
Jennifer,
I admire your point of view on being single. I used to struggle with even thinking about being single by the time I reached your age. Just the thought of it made me feel “panicky”. That was before my Heavenly Father started working on my thoughts concerning singleness and how it has a beauty all its own.
I can now honestly say, “Thy Will be Done” even if it means a lifetime of singleness.
And I’m *only* 22 years now….
and yes, there is still much, very much, work to be done.
Wow this was such a great article, i can relate so well to you Jennifer i’m 28, and unmarried and single now, i went through a break up in July, and felt sad and alone, and didn’t understand why God took my ex fiance away from me, BUT now with TIME having had passed i’m starting to understand that there is a reason for everything, for every single thing that happens to us. You are completely correct when you say that our Loving God wants us to be HIS bride most of all, ONCE we become his bride and become wise and gracious and truly humble AND once we are truly ready for a husband then He’ll provide us with that, for now we have to be patient and thanks to your wonderful post i am more patient and i feel like i understand HIS will much better thanks to this wise and wonderful Post.
You reconfirmed what Jesus wanted me to know, HE wants me most of all to be his bride…HIS LOVING Bride of Christ..that’s most important, i see that now..THANK YOU for this wonderful Post Jennifer! I appreciate it so very much..thanks again!
And happy 27th Birthday!!
)
))
May it be a year of blessings, happiness, joy and everlasting peace that only Jesus can give
Blessings and HUGS!
May God bless you and guard you always!
PTL (Praise the Lord)
In Him, Jane.
I was so needing to read this. I haven’t learnt real patience or the ability to wait on Gods timing, but I’m getting there.
Thank you for your thoughtful comments on this article!
It is encouraging to know that there are many others in the same position as I am ~ faithfully waiting for the honorable position of companion and help meet to a husband.
In the meantime, there is so much work to be done in the Lord’s Vineyard. When we busy ourselves in daily tasks and in helping others, this is where ‘life happens’ and when we learn and grow!
“Trust in the LORD, and do good; so shalt thou dwell in the land, and verily thou shalt be fed. Delight thyself also in the LORD; and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in Him; and He shall bring it to pass.” ~Psalm 37:3-5
~A fellow laborer