Interview Part Five

Do you ever get sick of your family?

Jeannie: I wouldn’t say I get sick of my family because we are very close-knit and I love them dearly, but I’ll admit to having times when it’s difficult to get along with one or more family members! There is no one in my family that I haven’t clashed with at some point (some more often than others!).

I believe that God puts us in our families for the good of all parties concerned. He knows what we need to help us mature, and each member of a family has different strengths and weaknesses. Part of the process of sanctification is being “polished” by others (and helping “polish” them, as well). Although it can be painful and sparks can fly at times, it is both good and necessary. I have found that praying for the “oil of grace” helps reduce friction and cushion the bumps ? while also helping my heart be teachable.

Elisabeth: I’m a phlegmatic, so basically, no. Of course, I’ve also been in and out of the house for the last ten years, so absence makes my heart even fonder!

Lanier: Well, I don’t live with them anymore, but when I did, I have to say on the whole, ‘no’. They were the people that loved me and understood me better than anyone else. And until Philip came along I really was happy living at home. That doesn’t mean we didn’t get on each other’s nerves. My sister and I had adjoining rooms and the door was usually open between them. But whenever the door was closed—from either side—we just knew that the other person needed some space. I love my solitude, and I’d often take long walks or solitary picnics or drives just to think or pray. And I always seemed to have more tolerance for everyone when I’d had time alone with the Lord that morning. That was the single most important thing for me.

Natalie: Do I ever want time alone and feel impatient with everyone’s foibles and quirks? Of course–we’re only human. However, my family are some of my best friends and I enjoy being with them more than anyone else! Perhaps this is because we moved quite a bit in my childhood and my brothers were my primary playmates. We spend hours together in the car and have an absolute blast; we sit around the dinner table and talk for ages; we do nothing and enjoy it just because we are together.

This is not to imply that we never argued or got upset with each other. Part of this will lessen with maturity on all your parts, but part of it can come only through nurturing a Christ-like, selfless love for your family. If they annoy you, acknowledge the feeling and then turn it over to God. Your reaction to your family is critical, especially when you are an older sibling who is setting an example for the others.

How did you cope with those awkward teen years when so many kids just seem to want space and freedom from their parents?

Jeannie: Thankfully, God intervened in my teen years by sending me a period of loneliness. I had basically no friends my age for several years, and that kept me close to my parents. Of course, there were tensions and disagreements at times. (That should be blamed on sin nature, not age, although hormones and wanting to “grow up” do have an effect.)

I’ve learned that our parents are safeguards for those years. When I would “pull away” and desire freedom, it was often because I wanted to do things that my parents didn’t approve of. Guess what? If your parents don’t approve, there’s probably a good reason – and chances are, God wouldn’t approve either! Even if something is not sin, teenagers lack the wisdom to see what the consequences of some decisions could be down the road. I believe that wise, restrictive parents are the greatest gifts God gives teenagers.

Elisabeth: Sorry, I was a homebody, so I guess I can’t help. *smile*

…and how do you motivate yourselves to do all the stuff you do?

Jeannie: God made me a motivated person! I really don’t struggle with making myself want to do more things – instead, I tend to over-commit myself and take on too many responsibilities and projects. I am blessed to be the oldest of eight children, so I’ve had responsibilities from a young age. Living on a farm has also taught me the value of hard work and determination. But really, I think most of it is just my personality – I’m a very goal-oriented person! (Like my dad!)

Elisabeth: Now, that often is a problem! I have loved to do so many of the things that I’m supposed to do that it is hard to make myself do the things I don’t like to do. The Bible verse that helps me is this one: “Work out your own salvation with fear and trembling, because it is God who is at work in you both to will and to do His good pleasure.”

Natalie: 1 Corinthians 10:31. Every day on this earth is a gift. There is so much to do and experience and explore! Good, thought-provoking books to read, family to cherish, the church to serve with, unbelievers to love. When we remember our purpose for being here, we cannot help but desire to do a great many things. But we do it not to pad a resume or feel good about ourselves–we do it because it pleases the Lord. We do it because that is what He created us to do! Ephesians 5:16 says this well. There is no time for wasting or “killing” when you are living as a servant of the King.

Honor the Lord with your weekend…see you on Monday.