…Spiritual strength matters more than physical strength, but physical strength is still an important part of manliness. No, a guy doesn’t have to be a hulk to be a man. But I think Christian men should strive to strengthen their bodies, and shouldn’t be afraid of a few hard knocks.Dr. Hake loves to say that true manliness is perfect strength under perfect control. I’ve never heard a better definition. …Yes, men should be kind and caring – strength under control – but not soft. It was great to see a bunch of guys out beating and bruising each other today, yet opening and closing the game with prayer.
I think that’s manly.
-Will Glaser, on manliness and football
Click here to read the whole post.
Woman was created from the rib of man,
not from his head to top him;
neither from his feet to be walked upon.
She was made from his side to be his equal;
from beneath his arm to be protected by him;
from very near his heart to be loved by him.
-unknown
Why must feminists substitute for the glorious hierarchical vision of blessedness a ramshackle and incoherent ideal that flattens all human beings to a single level—a faceless, colorless, sexless wasteland where rule and submission are regarded as a curse, where the roles of men and women are treated like machine parts that are interchangeable, replaceable, and adjustable, and where fulfillment is a matter of pure politics, things like equality and rights? This is a world that the poets have never aspired to, the literature of the ages has somehow missed, a world that takes no account of mystery…
The first woman was made specifically for the first man, a helper, to meet, respond to, surrender to, and complement him. God made her from the man, out of his very bone, and then He brought her to the man.When Adam named Eve, he accepted responsibility to “husband” her—to provide for her, to cherish her, to protect her. These two people together represent the image of God—one of them in a special way the initiator, the other the responder. Neither the one nor the other was adequate alone to bear the divine image.,
The world looks for happiness through self-assertion. The Christian knows that joy is found in self-abandonment. “If a man will let himself be lost for My sake,” Jesus said, “he will find his true self.” A Christian woman’s true freedom lies on the other side of a very small gate—humble obedience—but that gate leads out into a largeness of life undreamed of by the liberators of the world, to a place where the God-given differentiation between the sexes is not obfuscated but celebrated, where our inequalities are seen as essential to the image of God, for it is in male and female, in male as male and female as female, not as two identical and interchangeable halves, that the image is manifested.
To gloss over these profundities is to deprive women of the central answer to the cry of their hearts, “Who am I?” No one but the Author of the Story can answer that cry.
-Elisabeth Elliot
in chapter 25 of Recovering Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: A Response to Evangelical Feminism, by Wayne Grudem and John Piper
Click here to read the whole chapter.
Heh. I read Will’s blog first and then came over here. I had just finished asking if being a woman, then, was “perfect beauty under perfect control.” I think it might be. Just as a man’s strength truly comes from his courageous, persevering heart, so a woman’s beauty stems from her peaceful, trusting heart. What do you think?
You read my brother’s blog first, before mine? ::pout:: LOL!
But I think your idea might be right…perfect beauty under perfect control… Hmm…
It will be interesting to see what the other YLCF readers think…
I think perfect beauty must be a peaceful, content, trusting spirit in God in any circumstances He has us in at the moment.
A woman’s struggle often is contentment and doing the job God has for us now, living in the present for His glory… just an idea, I’m also interested in other’s oppinion.
-Bethany Joy
Am I allowed to post a comment which disagrees? I mean this for the purpose of adding an extra thought, and not to sound adversarial. I don’t want to offend any of you wonderful young ladies, for I do enjoy reading this site.
If men were simply strong, and women simply soft, I think we might find ourselves in a very unbalanced society. Think of the strong and courageous women in the Bible. I think they were much more concerned about that than being beautiful. Consider the men who chose a soft response, rather than showing off strength. I think those examples are truly powerful.
I confess I find Elliot’s comment somewhat ironic, since it appears that it is usually anti-feminists who remind others of the so-called “curse” which supposedly forces women to submit to men and be ruled by them, rather than the other way around.
There is no telling if Eve was taken out of bone. The Hebrew in Genesis simply means “a part of”. I have heard that the idea that it was the “rib” from which Eve came is actually from Jewish mythology – probably the same source where that unknown quote comes from. I just find this interesting, since we seem to base so much on this idea. Any thoughts?
Thank you for the food for thought!
- A woman who passionately loves God
Well, I think you’re probably at least somewhat right. There are a lot more complications wrapped up in my statement than are readily obvious on the surface. For one thing, men and women image God together as a complement and individually. Women have courage – there’s no doubt about that. Men have their own sort of beauty too. And there we see the qualification that comes necessary. I couldn’t just say, “Men have beauty!” They have their own sort. We women have our own sort of courage.
I don’t think it’s a curse that we submit. I think the whole fact that it is “submission” comes from this being a fallen world. If men were perfectly loving, they would take us into account every time and there would be no felt pain in following. As it is, if we were perfectly submissive (I do hate that word!) then it would be easy for the guys to love us. Neither one of those is gonna happen perfectly!
I think that both of these emotions should be inspired by the other’s heart. A man’s perfect strength, if it exists, inspires me (a naturally strong leader) to follow. A woman’s perfect beauty will inspire a man to love. A respected man will grow stronger, and a loved woman more beautiful.
I am still waiting to try this in real life. I don’t think women need to submit to all men by any stretch of the imagination. I think all we sinful creatures need to keep each other’s natural sin inclinations in check. Further, I may just have a good idea sometimes that only I can implement. So be it.
Though I did originally want to comment that the passage in the post doesn’t really explain what the mystery of our complementarity is. I guess that is because Elisabeth Elliot is leaving it a mystery.
Oh, and I guess my above statements do boil down to submission being part of the curse. The fact that it is submission and not willing follower-hood is part of both men’s and women’s sin. But it does not have to be painful.
Oh, bother it. I don’t have the words. Or rather, I have too many of them and not enough time to write them.
Can someone else join in?
Well, I don’t think submission is a curse. I was just thinking about Elliot’s statement saying that that is what feminists call it. It just appears that calling it a curse usually comes from anti-feminists telling women that they are cursed to submit. I don’t think that is submission, but subjugation.
I view submission as a nice thing. I submit to my husband. I love him and do what I can to be united with, support him and meet his needs. I would go to the ends of the earth to make him happy. It is a blessing! It is also an equal blessing to have a loving husband who lifts me up and loves me, too! His servant heart toward me seems like a form of submission.
I think our giving, serving and submitting to each other is a beautiful thing, because it comes from a loving willing heart from both of us. It is not a curse! It is something we love to willingly share with each other. Like the same attitude Jesus had when washing His disciples’ feet. If both husband and wife serve and submit to each other like that, it is not a curse, but a choosing to bless each other.
About the strength and beauty of men and women, I don’t doubt that there is a difference. But I think just as natural differences vary between the two genders, it also differs from man to man and woman and woman. A woman working on a farm with her husband might have to have a different strength than a woman missionary in a war zone. Not all men are called to be strong or soft in the same way, nor women. I think there is a season for each for all of us.
Again, thank you for such interesting discussion and food for thought, ladies!
Bless you!
- the same woman
Hi girls,
This topic is something, I have always been intrigued by, and so I thought I would add some of my thoughts! (-: Sorry it is so. Long!
Sarah, I loved this statement you made earlier…
“A man’s perfect strength, if it exists, inspires me (a naturally strong leader) to follow. A woman’s perfect beauty will inspire a man to love. A respected man will grow stronger, and a loved woman more beautiful.”
I am also a naturally strong leader. As I have grown up, I have found that this statement has been very true in my life. When I was younger I tended to show my dominate personality more around boys, than the quiet and meek spirit that Paul talks about in the Word. I always thought I could do anything the boys could do and probably better. I disliked anything that was feminine, detested wearing pink, and abhorred all the “girl talks and doing the girl things.”
I have found that this feminist’s mindset tends to show up more in the girls, who have not had great friendships or relationships with the male figures in their lives. These figures can be their brothers, dads, pastors, or simply male friends. When a young woman is not being treated or cared for correctly by the male figures in her life…she tends to develop a survival mode. In this survival mode, she will begin to pick up the slack that the men are dropping and run with it until a man (like the one Sarah described above) has the courage and the strength to step up to the plate and take her place.
Now to clarify…I do not mean…a man trying to supersede a woman, just because he thinks he could do it better or because he is a man. This “supersede mindset” is wrong and will normally succeed in pushing the woman farther into her feminism.
A Godly man will recognize that she is able to do it, but will also have the servant’s heart, strength, and courage to do it for her. It is an attitude of biblical manliness that says, “Christ instructed us men to serve the ladies as Christ served His bride (the church).” This mindset says, “Because I am a man and I recognize my calling of being a
Servant-leader let me have the privilege to serve you.” This is why your statement Sarah of “A man’s perfect strength, if it exists, inspires me (a naturally strong leader) to follow” is true! It is easier to follow a young man’s leadership, regardless of his age, when he is being a servant-leader as Christ was.
In my case, I am the oldest of eight girls, and I have always been my dad’s right hand person. As a young teenager, my identity was locked up in what I had made myself into, not who God wanted me to be. I was a strong independent, bold, young woman who had no idea what it meant to be a Godly woman. The character qualities I often operated in were excellent qualities, except that I used them incorrectly for my fleshly advantage. This mindset did not allow me the freedom to be a young woman after God’s own heart. Let me share a little about how the Lord brought me back into balance on this issue.
One of my best friends is a young man in our local homeschool group. He and I are about 9 months apart, we have grown up together, and our families are very close friends. When he was 12, his parents began to encourage him to make the switch from being the child to becoming the man he is today. This young man made it one of his life purposes to serve the young women, and of course the older women, in his social circles. Chivalry was and still is, one of his strongest character qualities.
Since, I happened to be in one his circles…I quickly became his project case. He started with door opening; now…I was horrible at this; my philosophy was “why wait for a guy to open the door if you get there first, I mean my hands do work…and I can open a door.” My philosophy did not deter him; it only served to challenge him to help me become more feminine. One afternoon while our families were together, he pulled me aside and proceeded to tell me the meaning of the character quality Deference. Which means, “Limiting my freedom so I do not offend the tastes of those around me.” He looked at me and said, “You need to limit your freedom of opening the doors…so you do not offend me.”
(Of course, he said this with a humble attitude and big smile.)
Because I highly respected this young man…and my spirit knew he was right, the Lord helped me swallow my pride, and say, “Ok I will try, but you may have to remind me.”
This young man and two of my other friends, who I have now adopted as my younger brothers, have played vital parts in helping the Lord and my parents make me into the young women that I am today! I now can wear pink and enjoy it, I can go shopping if I need too, I can buy cute purses, talk with the girls on or off the phone, and now I even know how to have more fun with the guys, I am around, in a Godly way.
To my sisters in Christ who are reading this…be encouraged you can be friends with young men. Some of you might say whoa…wait….there are not any mature young men that I am ever around, so this does not apply to me! I have to say…NO it does apply to you! There are many ways that we can gently push young men into biblical manhood. Our job as young women is to encourage, respect, and affirm the men in our lives.
I once read an article on Focus on the Families website by Lysa TerKeurst called “Becoming His Beauty” in it she quotes John Eldridge from his book “Wild at Heart” where he says: “I’m telling you that the church has really crippled women when it tells them that their beauty is vain and they are at their feminine best when they are ‘serving others.’ A woman is at her best when she is being a woman.”
I completely agree!!! “Women are best when they are being women.” When we walk in our callings, and use the talents that God has given us. We can then, turn and help push a young man into his destiny. This is why God created us! To be their helpmate…this even includes your guy friends. I would encourage you ask your guy friends what they would prefer “help or resistance” and see what answers you get! John Eldridge says in his book a little later that we need to “use all we have as woman to get him to use all he’s got as a man. To this I say Go Girls!!!
My brothers (-: and I have discussed this subject many times and they completely agree with John Eldridges statements! Girls, do not take my word for it ask your male figures in your life and go from there!
Many Blessings
Kelci
Girls,
Some great posts and comments!
Kelci, I too think of myself as a rather independent woman, and your men opening doors experience is similar to mine. I have always loved pink, though! (Just had to say that)
A few years ago I realized I should be helping my brothers become gentlemen. So, I have been making my brothers open the car door, store doors, etc. But sometimes I do forget. While out with my bro one day recently, I pushed the store door open and marched out. My brother said, “Uh, you didn’t wait, so-and-so stands there and waits for me.” At first I was rather upset, but after thinking about it (all afternoon) I decided he wanted to take care of me, he wasn’t trying to put me down. In order for men to be men, we have to be women!
I have to agree with the second anonymous. God has given some women the gift of being a leader. But, on a slightly different vein, Esther has been held up as a strong, courageous, leader. In reality, she was in a position of leadership, but she took her marching orders from her lawful male authority, Mordecai.
Quoting Kelci:
“When a young woman is not being treated or cared for correctly by the male figures in her life…she tends to develop a survival mode. In this survival mode, she will begin to pick up the slack that the men are dropping and run with it until a man (like the one Sarah described above) has the courage and the strength to step up to the plate and take her place.” This needed to be read again, so there it is. I have met far too many women like that and I usually get very discouraged and think “are there any real women in this world?” Then I remember my mother and smile, “yes, there is.”
I have come to the conclusion that being a true woman is a frame of mind, now I just have to figure out the which frame!
Very interesting discussion going on here! Although I agree with you all on many of the things commented here, I’d like to offer some other thoughts on several things. I know each of our situations and personalities are different, but please give my comments a chance. =)
Kelci said:
“I have found that this feminist’s mindset tends to show up more in the girls, who have not had great friendships or relationships with the male figures in their lives. These figures can be their brothers, dads, pastors, or simply male friends. When a young woman is not being treated or cared for correctly by the male figures in her life…she tends to develop a survival mode. In this survival mode, she will begin to pick up the slack that the men are dropping and run with it until a man (like the one Sarah described above) has the courage and the strength to step up to the plate and take her place.”
I disagree. I think it’s very common to place blame for the feminists’ mindset on guys in our life who are unwilling to treat us (and other women) correctly. Sorry, that just doesn’t fly. It’s not the guys’ fault. Whether you have a quiet, stay-in-the-background personality or if you are a take-charge, independent personality, one thing doesn’t change: women, in the very depths of our flesh, want control. It began in the Garden of Eden, “Your desire shall be for your husband, and he shall rule over you” (Gen. 3:16).
In his commentary, Matthew Henry suggests, “She is here put into a state of subjection. The whole sex, which by creation was equal with man, is, for sin, made inferior, and forbidden to usurp authority. The wife particularly is hereby put under the dominion of her husband…This sentence amounts only to that command, ‘Wives, be in subjection to your own husbands’; but the entrance of sin has made that duty a punishment, which otherwise it would not have been. If man had not sinned, he would always have ruled with wisdom and love; and, if the woman had not sinned, she would always have obeyed with humility and meekness; and then the dominion would have been no grievance: but our own sin and folly make our yoke heavy. If Eve had not eaten forbidden fruit herself, and tempted her husband to eat it, she would never have complained of her subjection; therefore it ought never to be complained of, though harsh; but sin must be complained of, that made it so. Those wives who not only despise and disobey their husbands, but domineer over them, do not consider that they not only violate a divine law, but thwart a divine sentence.”
Girls, it’s our sin nature! I don’t believe that we’re taking up the guys’ slack–and thus causing the feminist problems. Instead, our attitudes and rebellion to God’s plan is forcing the men out of their God-given place of authority. We think we can handle the situation better than the way that God designed.
Our society is saturated with lies about masculinity and femininity. Satan’s deception has a firm stronghold in many of our minds because of it. Think about the last three movies you’ve watched. How are the authority figures (which are usually men) portrayed? Pastors, police, government authorities, and *especially* husbands and fathers…they’re made to look like fools. And of course, the capable women rise up to pick up the slack and “patch up” where the guys were stupid. Girls, this is Satan’s agenda!! When we don’t have the right mindset about authority, we can’t relate rightly to God’s authority in our lives.
Don’t take the easy way out and blame it on the “weak” guys. Please consider the possibility of our very own attitudes causing this cycle. We must humble ourselves and choose (yes, it’s a choice!) to live where God designed us to live.
Disclaimer: I’m not saying that guys don’t have any issues. That, however, it not our problem. =)
Further, Kelci commented:
“To my sisters in Christ who are reading this…be encouraged you can be friends with young men. Some of you might say whoa… wait….there are not any mature young men that I am ever around, so this does not apply to me! I have to say…NO it does apply to you! There are many ways that we can gently push young men into biblical manhood. Our job as young women is to encourage, respect, and affirm the men in our lives.”
Please take this with a grain of salt and be very cautious in relationships with men (outside of your family)! If we’re living out our God-given calling (with a Godly attitude), then this will automatically happen. It’s not something we need to pursue. Yes, we absolutely need to encourage, respect and affirm the men in our lives…but start with your Dad (or obviously, your husband)! If you have brothers, then they’re definitely included as well. But please be sensitive in other relationships and make sure they’re completely approved by your Dad. There’s a certain level of respect and affirmation in a relationship that I believe should be only for a Dad or husband. Of course, there’s a basic level of respect and encouragement that should be found in any encounter with any guy, because that’s the attitude that should be found in any Christian woman. Affirmation and encouragement draws people together, and I don’t want that between any guy and me except for my Dad, brothers and husband (in the future!). There’s definitely a balance here.
I honestly am not trying to pick a fight and would be very interested in any responses to my thoughts and convictions on the subject.
“Ruth”
Ruth,
Very good points! I think that the Lord used your poast to bring a blanance to my post. There will be young ladies who will identify with my post more than yours and there will also be the young ladies who better identify with your post. Thank you for your comments!
Recently I have lested to a 9 part series on relationships by Joshua Harris’ singles pastor Eric Simmons.
This series is where I picked up some of my points. If anyone would be interested you can listen to them at this website: http://www.covlife.org/ourlife/singles_feature_pastseries.php
Click on the Relationships tab. This series is one of the best series that I have every heard taught on this subject! Eric and the other pastors do an awesome job!
Also you can listen to 2 messages that Josh Harris did in their church recently called “Courtship Shmourtship”….and “Courtship is a Community Project” at this link below.
http://www.covlife.org/tools/sermons.php
May the Lord Bless you all! Kelci
Ruth and Kelci and all,
Thank you for all your great thoughts and being willing to dialogue respectfully in love! I think you are providing a good balance to each other. I have not had time to truly sit down with this myself but our wonderful Lanier is going to address it and I know we are all going to look forward to that!
“This series is where I picked up some of my points.”
Which points were you talking about, specifically, Kelci? And how do you support them Biblically? I would be interested in listening to the series, but I don’t think I’m going to make it through 9 sessions this morning (or while we have this discussion going, for that matter). =)
I would appreciate some clarification and elaboration on your thoughts (in contrast or in relation to mine), if you would like to do so.
God places us in different situations and is teaching us different things in different ways. =) But truth is truth. Any thoughts?
In Christ,
Ruth
Ruth…I am going to work on this…Look for a post later from me. Maybe I will call my bros and get some of their opionins (-: This discussion is good, but it would be better if some mature guys/dads were able to read it and give their opionions! Then it would be truly be balanced. Kelci
ps.Lanier, I am looking forward to reading what you might be able to share with us.
Looking forward to it.
Whoa! I just realized that this comments thread had exploded with fascinating stuff.
I’m glad I scrolled down again.
On the “weak” guys issue… I think I understand what both Kelci and Ruth are saying. I think Kelci is right – female dominance tends to spring up in situations where surrounding males are weaker. I also think Ruth is right – the source of the dominance is our natural sin inclination to rule. The thing is, for a young girl growing up, it is not easy to discern what exactly the trouble is, because she may not realize her own sin. The end result, however, is that we ladies are responsible for ourselves, not for the guys. The cycle of sin has to stop somewhere. It might as well be with us. This is incredibly hard for me, but sometimes I just have to close my mouth and step aside. If the guys don’t have room to grow, they won’t.
The “affirmation of guys” is a tricky issue. If you have a strong, godly group of friends, both guys and girls, who generally hang out together and have a perfect understanding that nobody is interested in anyone else… affirmation is a great idea. I have a group like this at college. But I’ve found that a lot of guys will take affirmation and a sincere interest in their well-being as evidence of a more serious interest. Unless you have that more serious interest, it is wise to be very, very cautious. In my experience.
Again, this is the limited knowledge of an unmarried, non-courting 22-year-old talking. I am looking forward to seeing what Lanier says.
Just one thing on the affirmation issue. I suppose to be real technical, we need to define “affirm” and exactly what type of behavior and comments would stem from it. However, considering the basic meaning of the word, I just don’t think it’s any young lady’s place to affirm guys outside of her family. I have brothers (older and younger) and definitely don’t want girls–even good, Christian friends–having that type of relationship with them. Those are not the people they need affirmation from. Obviously not to be taken to the other extreme…it doesn’t call for cutting up, tearing down and unedifying comments, in any way.
Ruth
All right…I have decided that since we are all females…that this conversation could go in circles and while we all have worded everything differently…we believe the same things.
I talked to one of my girl friends about this post and she made a comment about one of Ruth’s comments made earlier today. “I think it’s very common to place blame for the feminists’ mindset on guys in our life who are unwilling to treat us (and other women) correctly. Sorry, that just doesn’t fly. It’s not the guys’ fault. Whether you have a quiet, stay-in-the-background personality or if you are a take-charge, independent personality, one thing doesn’t change: women, in the very depths of our flesh, want control. It began in the Garden of Eden.”
To this, my friend and I would have to say…we disagree.
In true reality it not about woman wanting control it is about woman wanting “security.” Women will use control to get security. (Eve did she did not eat of the fruit, for control. She ate of the fruit because the snake offered her more security…or so she thought.) Control is not the object of gain; but Security is!
As far as male friendships, I should say first Ruth and Sarah your wisdom is right on. Girls Stay under your realms of authority! Know where you stand with a guy before affirming him too much, other than just being a sister in Christ like we are called to be in 1 Corinthians. 12. Walk in love and do not throw wisdom out the back door.
As far as me: I should say first in my friendships with guys, I am under my parents authority and wisdom
I would also like to state that in my circle of friends that I am around allot, there are only 2 other guys that are older than I am. In both of these friendships, I know where I stand and can act accordingly. The rest of my guy friends are all younger, and so I am just the cool big sister. These are the primary guys I am affirming. Women cannot bestow masculinity…but they can call it forth. I want to live my life in such a way…that I call forth masculinity in the young men, in whose lives I have influence. I try to affirm where it is needed and appropriate, show honor and respect to whom it is due, and I try to treat all my brothers, in Christ, with a brotherly-sisterly affection that Paul talked about in 1 Corinthians 12. Since, the Body of Christ is made up of both men and women; we have to learn how to be friends with each other. Jesus had several close friends that were women also.
He knew he needed both side to as be effective. (Look at all the lessons he taught that had women involved with them…and Paul he had several friends that were women.)
Some will not be able to understand my view or think that I am walking a strange path…but most girls I have found who oppose my ideas have no concept of what I am talking about! Mostly because they have either never been allowed or encouraged to be friends with guys in a Godly way, (Girls…guys are not just for relationships) or have been hurt in friendships with guys, or just simply and do not know how to be friends with guys.
Face it girls… friendships are dangerous…there is always a risk involved when you leave yourself vulnerable enough to become a friend. God made men and women differently, we think and we act differently! “Guess what” when we recognize and accept each other for who we are; then we can learn how to be friends and work together to create the perfect team! You cannot beat a Godly man + woman team! (Alternatively group situations where you have both guys and girls.)
Anyways, that was God’s original plan! Moreover, while it does apply to husband/ wife relationships…it can also apply to Godly friendships between a guy and a girl. Well I need to run…share some comments with me!
Gretchen, would you mind commenting on this? Thanks Kelci
I don’t think Gretchen has time at the moment, though she might surprise us. Lanier is going to chime in. I would personally say that what started as a simple topic of the difference between men and women and how they express their strengths has gone off on submission, guy-girl friendships etc. and we can’t solve them all at once (or maybe at all?
).
I personally want to caution in discussing guy-girl friendships. It is a very volatile issue and we are all young women and have limited vision. Let’s be gentle and careful with each other, that’s all I ask. This is a place for encouragement. We have chosen not to set up dogmatic stands on certain issues because those are best left to the individual families.
Gretchen? Any thoughts?
Thanks Natalie! Kelci
If I have come across to strong I apologize!…I look forward to hearing from Lanier! Blessings to All!
Sorry to hijack the original article and thread, Natalie! Regardless, I’ve thoroughly enjoyed the thought-provoking discussion that has ensued.
For the sake of harmony, I’ll allow the security vs. control and affirmation issues rest for now, whether I agree with you or not. =)
One last thought (please?!) on friendships. Kelci, you may be surprised if you knew me and how I related to guys. But anyway, I just want to point out something about the way God made guys and girls to work together. “You cannot beat a Godly man + woman team!”
Yes, we get along, and frankly, we’re attracted to guys. Of course we are! God made us “click”–or else marriage could never work! But that closeness and (and possible vulnerability, since you put it that way) is for marriage, not for a friendship outside of it.
Oops, I meant to sign that last post…
Love,
Ruth
Some Fathers and Mothers have said “no guy friends” to some girls, and we need to respect them just as much as the girls who do have guy friends.(my best friends parents said that)
We need to watch that we arent’t saying you have to have guy friends in order to fulfill God’s purpose for our life and in order for girls to be feminine.
I am really encouraged reading all the posts and comments on this topic! Keep it up, girls!
K
Hmm. . .this reminds me of my novel I’m writing, and C.S.Lewis on hierarchy and gender. Except my novel is set in Arthurian England, so with courtly love and all there is a lot of switchery. . .the knights submitting to their ladies by defending them and such, and now my main character’s mother is very worried since the main character doesn’t realize that a friend of hers wants to marry her.